Be the Help YOU Need – Heal Your Life
Be the Help YOU Need
Why waste your energy and time on finding someone who will solve all your problems and bring a change to your life
You need to know that the solution you need, and the change you need lies within yourself.
Most often than not, we tend to rely on other people to help us out of our hurts and pain but at the end of the day, we end up disappointed with more hurts to deal with. Yes, sometimes people will help you and bring you out of that dark well, but I want you to know that it is mostly because you willed yourself to.
Let’s consider together the possibility of no one being there to help at the moment you need it the most. Even friends come and go and your truest friend might not always be available to
help you.
I am not saying that you can’t depend on other people or refuse to receive help from others – it is almost impossible to live without others. However, it is important that you are self-sufficient to an extent so that you are able to help yourself whenever you need to.
You might be thinking that your soulmate will be the solution to all of your problems, but I’m also certain you do not want to be overbearing on them just as you wouldn’t want someone to be overbearing on you.
You’d want to be confident and free of your past hurt and pain before finding your soulmate. This will help you to build a better relationship.
Being the help you need starts with you having a relationship with yourself – finding who you are as a person and learning to enjoy being YOU.
It’s also important to learn to trust yourself and your own judgments and your decisions, because ultimately, that is what will shape your destiny.
When feeling down and refuse to help ourselves, we give our insecurities the reins to take over and end up feeling more down and depressed. However, what we don’t realize is that we can turn all of that around.
When I was healing my life, I didn’t want to be in a relationship. I knew I had to learn how to lift myself up when no is there for me. Most of the time, I had no one so I had to do it myself. I have to be honest with you though, it wasn’t easy because I felt lonely sometimes.
But deep down I knew I have to be able to lift myself up so I don’t become a liability.
So, how do you lift yourself up
You have to start by making the decision to.
Until you make the choice to be happy and not to stay sad, whatever efforts you make will either be a temporary fix or will be generally non-effective.
From there, you take an action towards making you feel better. There are many little things you can do, it doesn’t matter how big or small it is – as long as it makes you happy.
It might be as simple as going for a walk, or seeing a funny movie. You could even pamper yourself with a Spa treatment, or just take the weekend off.
There was this morning I woke up feeling really sad within myself, and I didn’t want to get out of bed. Then I remembered the promise I’ve made to myself to always help myself up whenever I’m down
I decided to watch a funny movie, I laughed and laughed till I had tears rolling down. It was the best feeling and it helped me to feel better.
So, if you do something you enjoy and makes you feel happy, you will feel BETTER.
You have to remember each time you feel down go back to your journal, (make sure to write down your decision to always help yourself somewhere), and see what you had written down and do that something that makes you feel good.
It helps builds your confidence. This is a tool you can use in your everyday life to conquer your fears and insecurities while you end up living each moment to the fullest.
When I met my soul mate, there was a time I was feeling down. Yes, he did lift me up – however I had to do the rest myself. I had to show that I can lift myself up. And that I did.
You can achieve this and more!
Tell me what is the ONE thing that you did to lift yourself up?
Remember, ‘I believe in You’
Much love Ronni xx
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I really needed this today. Encouraging myself has always been something that I have struggled with. I need to remember that in the own, I can only truly rely on myself for support In every single situation. Learning to give myself more credit and more love is a journey but an important one.
It’s so true, you have to be your own rock. It’s wonderful to find support in a therapist, friend, or community, but ultimately you need to make the choices and changes in your life. Nobody can do the hard work of healing except you. All others can do is guide or encourage you. And good advice to NOT start a relationship when you’re still doing important work. Wait until you are in a better space, not perfect, but better.
I hear your message, and I agree with it for the most part, however, there’s one thing I’d like to point out, if you’ll allow me?
Self-sufficiency is important, absolutely! There will often in our lives be no one else we can rely on, and it’s certainly not healthy to rely on a partner for all our emotional well-being (for us OR them). But also I feel like the message of “you need to be whole before you find your soulmate” can often translate to “if you’re broken you aren’t going to deserve love”, and that’s not a healthy mindset, either.
For some, depression and anxiety aren’t things they can lift themselves out of, and that they will have to spend their entire lives managing, so hearing such a message can feel a little like hearing that there isn’t a happy ending for them. So I think it’s important to balance the idea of self-sufficiency with the acknowledgement that some conditions and scars will require lifelong management, and it’s okay if you don’t feel whole all the time. You’re still worthy of love.